Monday, June 9, 2014

6/9/14: We're Still Alive...I Promise!

I've been needing to write for a while now, but it feels like there's so much to say and yet, so little at the same time.  So I've put it off.  But I can't sleep, and I need the catharsis right now, so here I am attempting.


Well, I'm now more than halfway through my master's program at BYU and it feels like it's flying by.  I've done almost half of my clinical hours and seen my clients do just about everything from dropping out of therapy early, hating me, depending on me way too much, and even starting to stand on their own two feet again and face the world without the help of therapy.  Obviously, the last scenario is the most rewarding for me to watch, not only because it reaffirms my self-doubts about whether or not I'm helping people, but because it's really inspiring to watch someone change before your eyes and build their own strength to the point of independence.

So as far as therapy-land is going, I'm still loving it.  My favorite clients are my families (so either kids with their parents, teens with their parents, or adult kids with their really old parents).  There's just so much going on in the session and it's amazing how quickly the change happens when you have parents who are involved and just want to love their kids and do their best.  I like working with couples as well, but their cases are a little discouraging sometimes because their marriages have fallen so far and a lot of them are here as a last resort so I just wish I knew how to help them better.  And as always, individuals are sometimes great, sometimes mind-numbing, depending on the client.  But I still want to do this for the rest of my life, so in my book, that's a win! :)

I'm seriously considering BYU's PhD program in MFT which would mean another 3 years of school here.  But they pay for it plus a generous stipend, I already know all the professors, and one of them is doing a research study about women's health issues and how marriage and family therapy can help with it.  He actually works on it in conjunction with the doctor who manages my chronic pain, so I'm very interested in joining his team.  It's hard to know if it'll be the right thing for us, but I feel pretty good about it and will hopefully be applying this Fall to start next year after I graduate.

As far as Dave and I, Dave got a promotion at work so that was a really huge blessing for us--the timing couldn't have been better--and he's happy with all his responsibilities at the MTC.  We are slowly chugging along on the house with paint and crown and trim.  We're almost done with all the upgrades we think we'll do, we just need to get the motivation to finish it!  We're hoping to be fully finished by the time Fall semester starts up again (I'll believe it when I see it...).  Dave's still liking his program at school and gets to take independent research credits this Spring/Summer, so it's like a pseudo-break in the sense that he doesn't have to physically be in class during the week, but just needs to do independent studying on his own for his dissertation.  He's still enjoying what he's learning, so that's great.  We realize we're both pretty lucky to have found things we're passionate about to be spending so much time and energy on :)

This past semester was really insane and we hardly saw each other because I came home around 9 pm almost every night, and he left around 6:30 am every morning.  We're enjoying the slow(er) pace of spring and summer so far because it means we actually get to see each other more than 1 hour a day, haha.  But even with all the craziness, the sheer mental and physical exhaustion, and the frozen lunches and dinners, we're really happy with our life.  We both love what we do, we live in a great house, we have a great ward, and we have family right here in Provo with us.  We just have to remind ourselves of all of that once in a while when things go haywire ;)

Here's a bit of life from the lens of my iPhone...

We still love our planter we built from the ground up :)
This was a bold risk for me!  But I love the blue and think it turned
out great. 
It just makes the house look more finished, I think. 

There will be another post dedicated to this picture,
but these were a concrete and very poignant
reminder to me that Heavenly Father is aware of me
and my pains and struggles.  A testimony that he
 uses angels to comfort the weary and strengthen the weak. 
UVMCO had their concert dedicated to America!!  While the
narration was a little strange, the music was incredibly
moving, and I've loved every minute of being in this
choir this semester!

Um...I live on these things...

And Dave lives on fishing, but I went with him and my Dad this time
and I caught some beautiful fish!

Puzzles are my current escape.  Since I can't solve my clients' problems,
and I can't solve the chronic pain, it's my reassurance that at
least some puzzles have answers.  

On a lighter note, I cut my hair last week!!
And I especially like it curled!

And I just want to go back here.  I spent the week in CA last week watching the kids of one of my favorite families ever for a week while their parents were gone.  It was a lot of work, but I would do it again in a heartbeat!